Eli is up to 10lb6oz now, so regardless of all the spitting up and misery, he's still gaining like a pro. So there's the sunny side.
The doctor and I came to the agreement that the formula has pretty much nothing to do with things, so we've switched back to the regular old gentle formula. He's having us add rice cereal as a thickener to try to keep the milk from sloshing so much and hopefully that will keep it in his belly. So far today it's been going down (and staying down) just fine. Whew!
Next problem: the screaming. He said according to the upper GI we had on Monday, Eli's top valve isn't working right, thus the reflux, but also, the lower valve isn't working quite right either, so his stomach isn't emptying as fast as it should be. He said I've got bum luck because the top valve problem means Eli is fussy while he eats, and the bottom valve means he is fussy after he eats, and then he's colicky the rest of the time since his poor belly is all crampy and full of crap. :)
Regarding the colic, the doctor asked if I have anyone to help out because he wants me to leave the house for 2 hours every day for awhile. He said babies feed so much on our emotions, and my stress from his constant screaming is causing him stress. I am not surprised to learn that he's picking up on my anxieties, but it sure isn't a good feeling. The doctor said it's common with screamers and he sees it a lot where a mom will bring a baby in screaming but then when handed to the doctor, the kid stops crying. He said we need to try to break the routine we're in where he cries all evening by finding someone to help me out when Josh isn't home so that I can be out of the house and we can try to "reset" things for Eli. He also made a point to say that while he does care about me and my mental health, he is telling me to make this happen for Eli's sake, not mine. He said I can sit on the porch and cry for two hours if I want to, but I need to be out of the house.
So that leads me to my last point. Since I don't have any family here to help out, I'm really at a loss for who to ask for help. I'm jealous of people who have their moms nearby! Anyone out there willing to come and sit with little Eli for two hours (5-7) some evening, maybe once a week for the next couple weeks? Next week will be Sunday, Wednesday, and Thursday. The week after that will be Monday, Tuesday, Friday, and Saturday. Pay is hugs. Plus, he'll probably be an angel for you. He only screams for me!