20w - all is well

Everything is fine! The doctor and the tech both looked at everything and said he looks perfect. They seemed a bit baffled as to what the other guy was talking about in his report. The doctor said maybe they saw the umbilical cord or the gall bladder and thought the dark spot might be fluid. He showed me all the places the fluid should be and said everything looks great. So... whew!!

I am tired from the stress but so relieved. It's annoying that they scared me like that, but I did get to see Little Dude for awhile and that was great, too. We got a perfect view of his boy goods, confirming that he, in fact, is a dude.

Thank you all so much for your prayers and thoughts and encouragement!

Here's a thumb-sucking picture for you:

19w6d - prayers for Baby

I got a voicemail to call the OB today, and before I even called them back, I was freaking out. I knew something was wrong because the nurse left me her number to call back and didn't say anything else on the message. I was crying before I called... and after, too.

She said the report from my 3D u/s (the gender scan) said to check the abdominal area for fluid. The nurse wasn't sure if it meant there was fluid in my abdomen or Baby's, and that the report was really vague. They are sending me to a specialist for a level-II ultrasound. It was originally scheduled for Monday, but Josh called and got it moved up, so it will be tomorrow at 3.

She also said they didn't see anything on the u/s I just had, so I'm hoping this is all just some kind of fluke. If not, I hope it at least is a problem with me that can be fixed and not a problem with Little Dude.

I'm really scared but trying to be hopeful that by tomorrow afternoon, all this worrying will have been for nothing. The idea of something going wrong after all this time is just unbearable to me.

Please pray for us! I'll keep you posted tomorrow.

18w5d - a rant and a picture

Well, today was the long-awaited anatomy scan!

And it totally sucked.

I have been so excited, counting down the days to see Little Dude again, and it sucked. The tech who did it was all business and no fun. She just did all the boring measuring, never pointed out anything but a couple organs. We didn't get to see a picture of his goods at all. At the beginning she said she'd let us know if she noticed. Like, how about we TRY? When I told her we were told boy before, she said she was pretty certain she had seen it earlier, but didn't get a good view. He did have his knees together (heaven forbid we get a picture of something even THAT good) but she didn't even poke around and try or anything. The whole thing might have lasted five minutes. She didn't even turn on the sound so I could hear the heartbeat!

The pictures she gave me suck, too. One is a profile, at least, and you can tell it's his face. But it's lame too and the other three are about useless.

I so want to go back to the private place. I don't understand why a tech wouldn't try harder--I mean, she has to know women are excited about this. I'm disappointed that we didn't get to see him moving, get any good pictures, or get to see his penis! And now I won't see him again until he's born... he darn well better be a boy when he comes out!

Anyway, here is his head... I think.

18w2d

It's been awhile. I'm just lazy lately.

Our anatomy scan is this coming Tuesday. Part of me feels like I can't believe I'm almost halfway done, but the other part feels like it's been forever. I'm so excited to see Little Dude again, especially knowing he has grown so much just since we saw him at 15 weeks.

I've been feeling some rolling around in there... a little here and there when I lie really still, usually at night. This morning when I was lying in bed I felt a little movement, but still nothing really big. I'm excited to feel kicks and other feelings that I'll know for sure aren't just gas.

Still no consensus on names. Thanks for all the suggestions! I like some of them a lot, but for both of us to agree will take some kind of miracle, I think. :)

I'm getting to the point where I really need maternity clothes. I've been wearing the pants for quite awhile but I've been getting away with regular shirts in bigger sizes. But now everything is too short or too tight, and it's getting more and more difficult. I can't believe how much this stuff costs! I've been checking thrift stores, but everything there is so old-fashioned... giant sweaters, flannel shirts, ugly dresses, and frumpy overalls... where are the cute, normal-looking things? Oh yeah. In the store, full-price, and beyond my budget. Dang it.

I took this picture for a friend the other day, so I figured I'd share it with you. I am still feeling mostly fat and frumpy, but it's beginning, I guess. My stomach is sticking out more than my boobs do, and if you knew me before I was pregnant, you'll know that's kind of a big deal.

scan results

Baby Burke is a BOY!

I have had girl feelings since the beginning and even though I tried to prepare myself for the possibility of seeing a penis, I have to admit that I cried. I felt so silly because the tech felt so bad and I know I should be happy! I also know I will be once it sinks in, but without intention I've thought of this baby by its girl name for a long time. We don't have a boy name yet, so I feel all out of control with this news!

Regardless of my state of mind, LBB looked perfect. Right away I knew I was going to get a boy determination when she told me the heartrate--it has been a steady 160 but this time it was 139. I looked at Josh and said, "I think you're going to win." He was sitting pretty still for awhile, even though I had SO MUCH sugar today. I think I must've put him in a coma! After pushing around a little he started moving and that was amazing to see. We got some cute shots of his little hands and feet and, of course, the package.


More pics are here:

15 wks

14w6d

Today is the day! My appointment is at 3:00 and this work day is really dragging!

I'm so excited and nervous. I'm afraid I'm going to get all worked up with excitement and then Baby's gonna be hanging out in there with its legs crossed the whole time. I've been drinking regular Sprite all day though, and I have a bottle of orange juice that I'm going to break open right around 2pm. And maybe I'll throw some candy in there too... hopefully all this will get LBB awake and doing a workout for us to get a good view. Send open-leg vibes our way today!

Watch for updates with genitalia! *hee hee*

13w3d

Well, the doctor said the rash is just a flukey case of eczema... he said it probably started with a small irritation and then my pregnant immune system went crazy with it. But I'm researching April's suggestion, too. I bought some Grandpa's Pine Tar Soap today because I read it could help. I used it tonight and man, does it smell terrible! The smell doesn't seem to stay on my skin though, thank goodness.

I found the heartbeat again tonight. I've been obsessing a little about my sickness last week... I took some Pepto and later realized it has aspirin in it, and I was worried about being dehydrated and hurting the babe, and I took a couple really hot showers... I'm hyper-paranoid anyway, so I've been worrying. But I finally found it, and now that I've heard it in the second trimester, I'm feeling confident now. Part of me can't believe I made it!

Our gender ultrasound is in 10 days! I'm excited and nervous. If you're going to guess the gender in the baby pool, you'd better do it before then or you'll be cheating. :) It's a link in the left side bar.

11w3d

Sorry for the quiet... not a lot to update lately. I found the heartbeat again on the doppler a few nights ago, but only for a couple seconds. I could hear all kinds of movement though, so that was pretty cool, too.

We've been adjusting this week to Josh's switch to night shift, so that's pretty much been all-consuming. I woke up with a cold yesterday and since I can't really take anything, I'm feeling pretty lousy. At least it's the weekend, I guess.

I had to reschedule the gender ultrasound since Josh's schedule changed, but it's now just two days later on October 29. They told me to drink lots of orange juice to get the baby moving. I'm praying LBB won't have his/her legs crossed but even then, I'm getting so excited just to see a new picture of the arms and legs and other things I didn't get to see yet at 8 weeks.

Just a week and a half to second trimester. Sometimes it seems like it's flying by and sometimes it seems like I've been newly pregnant for a million years. I'm ready for some new developments!

9w6d

Ten weeks tomorrow! Yay for double digits! I'm sure by week 25 or so it's going to start feeling like triple digits...

I've started having trouble sleeping and it's kind of disturbing to know it's only going to get worse. Months of sleeping on my side! Argh! Just this week I've started to not be able to sleep on my stomach anymore. I try to start on my side, but it's just so darned uncomfortable. So I try half side, half stomach, but that's only comfortable for a little while. I'm not sure how to teach myself to sleep on my side, but man, last night I got very little sleep and Josh was restless too, so we're tired today.

I scheduled the gender scan yesterday! On October 27, we'll know whether we're on Team Pink or Team Blue! Well, hopefully. I won't have another ultrasound at the doctor's until 20 weeks, but I scheduled an appointment at a private office where they'll do gender scans earlier. They say you get a return visit if they can't determine the gender, but I'm hoping to see something super obvious so I won't have to worry about whether the determination is right. Then I can start buying and thinking about decorating! How exciting.

On another exciting note, one of my best buds Mandy got a positive test today! Yay! I'm so excited that we'll get to do this together!

first ultrasound

Whew!

We had our first appointment today and Baby Burke has a heartbeat! I could hardly believe it when I saw the little flicker on the screen. It sounded great, too! Baby measured at 8w2d, so two days ahead of schedule, but we're sticking with the 4/23 due date.

The bloodwork adventure was less fun, as I expected. I was a big baby and cried and it took two nurses and two sticks. They took six vials, so I left feeling lightheaded but I survived. I made Josh stay in the waiting room for that part because I didn't want him to see me having an anxiety attack like that. The nurse was sweet though and even hugged me when I left. Ha!

Now I guess it's time to start getting the word out. We're out of the danger zone and on our way!

7w6d

Tomorrow is the big day! Part of me can't believe I've waited 4 weeks for this appointment. And yet, it has been the longest 4 weeks ever! Keeping the secret, being excited, feeling worried... it has all taken its toll and I am TIRED. I'm so nervous about what I'll hear tomorrow, but I have to try to be optimistic. Jen says so... :)

I went to the maternity store for the first time today. I was looking for a belly band, but the ones at Motherhood aren't as cute as some of the ones I've seen online. But the lady convinced me to try on a pair of jeans and man, did they feel amazing!! I have been feeling so awful in my clothes lately and these were wonderful. So I bought them... my first pair of maternity pants. I wish I could wear them all the time! I think I am very soon going to be moving into all stretchy pants! It feels good to breathe while sitting down. I had almost forgotten what it was like.

Allergy season is hitting me hard. With the pollen count high and not being able to take anything but benadryl, I'm having a hard time breathing and sleeping. I've been taking Benadryl at night, which has been leaving poor Josh with a very unavailable wife, if you know what I mean... so we are both praying the first frost will come early this year!

Not even 8pm yet and I'm thinking about bed...